Pauline surrounded by 55 bags of food she distributed this day
Giving Packaged Food:
The food packages have been rich in blessings and hardships. It seems to haven taken a life of its own over the year that we have been doing it. At first, it started with 2 -3 families every once in a while, to now, where we have had to stop at 60 bags, but probably have 80-85 families coming regularly. We are continually trying to figure out the best way to reach those who need it the most. Shpresa, the amazing lady that helps with this program said, "Pretty much everyone in Albania could use a food package, there is need everywhere." I have thought to myself, once the packages are 
given out and we have no more, just say, "I'm sorry but that's it for this month, please come again next month." But that is very hard to say to someone who is counting on this help and is turned away.
I feel terrible when I see the disappointment and despair on their faces. It also leads to more pandemonium in the morning with everyone trying to come at once to the gate. There is a lot to think about, but to be honest, I wouldn't change anything, except to try and make it better. There is nothing like giving people items they really need, food, medicine, clothes, etc. There is a fulfillment with this that I have never experienced, to actually have people come to your door looking to you for help. I am sure it is very humbling for them, so I make it a point to greet them with a smile and be as generous as possible. Everyone has their own story and problems that they bring to us. I must admit that after a while, they all tend to sound about the same. I know to them, their situation feels significant and unique. My job is to help in any way I can, even if it only to listen with some compassion and understanding.
This opportunity to continuously help people from our home also provides a unique learning experience for the children. It is front and center in their lives too that there are people who don't have a place to live or enough food to eat. As a result, wanting to give to others is becoming more second nature to them. Obviously I see this the most in Christopher who will continually surprise me with his comments. We walked by one of the beggars that I normally give to, and because my hands were full I did not give him a coin. Christopher became very concerned knowing we normally give and didn't, and we ended up going back and gave him his coin. I was taken aback by his ardent response and need to help. It is a wonderful thing to watch grow. Also, the children seeing people who have obvious ailments and disfigurements is more the norm and provides many learning opportunities for them and me.
I pray that God will continue to guide our efforts in all these missionary endeavors, because our goal is always to try and help those that need it most. Right now, I belief that it is me because of the incredible learning experience this has been for me.
Pauline greeting one of her youngest customers
